(no subject)

[gala_apples]

OH SWEET JESUS WHAT HAVE I DONE?

So I saw bebunny's bbb fic, and I immediately went to my mom. See, since I was a wee reading overacheiver, she's been trying to get me to read Jean Auel's series, and even at 9 I was like I AM NOT A HISTORICAL PERSON MOM GO AWAY LEMME READ DAD'S CRIMINAL PROFILING BOOKS. So as soon as I read the summary I was all *fingers pointed* you did this somehow! and then had to explain that it was BBB season, and what the difference between crossovers and fusions and recasts were, and how a friend had written a story set in the Clan of the Cave Bear verse. My mom laughed at me, and shortly after she went to bed.

Except. Except I just walked past their bedroom and she called me in and was all 'so this is a story with clan of the cavebear characters?' and I made an awkward simile with Star Trek and our local politicians as Uhura and Sulu and how maybe they don't go save the whales, but they save koalas. And I NEARLY distracted her with the horror of fucking with Star Trek canon. But then she asked if it was a straight recast, and I was all 'I doubt it, I'll go read the summary'. AND SHE GOT OUT OF BED AND FOLLOWED ME.

I read out the summary, and she thought it sounded interesting, and asked how much 17k was. So I clicked on the link to show her. And then she started trying to read, but she has diabetic retinopathy, so I had to ctrl+ the text about seven times. She asked if I could print it at that size, I told her it would be at least 100 pages printed.

So now her plan is to use my laptop tomorrow to read it. I told her it was nc17 she said there was sex in the books. I told her that was all well and good until she got to the gay porn bits. She said, and I quote "I know where stuff goes" gala: 0.0

Tomorrow will be an interesting day. I have no idea how I'll react if she ends up liking it. And oh god, Mikey/Pete is a main pairing. She'll have so much to read if she ends up caring.

What the fuck is my life?

Comments

[dr-jasley.livejournal.com]

I'm SORRY I SHOULDN'T BE LAUGHING.....

also god I would be mortified if my parents read fic


*hugs you*

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

Of course you should be laughing. I would totally laugh had it happened to anyone aside from me. *facepalm*

[morebliss.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I haven't read the books since I was a teenager, but I seem to remember there was some pretty good sex in the original. :D

[draconic-girl.livejournal.com]

Oh, my god... how much sex there was... lol. Read them as a VERY young teenager, before I even got into fandom. IDK, was there history too? Selective memory... ftw xD

But yeah... Moms and fanfic... can't quite imagine what my mom's reaction would be. Been into slash/fandom for years and years and she still has no idea what I've been doing. One time she saw me browsing my journal and there were some seriously NSFW slashy-pics there and she was like what's that? And I was like... *shifty-eyes* Pictures?

Oops, longish comment :)

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

My parents have known about fandom since day one, but that doesn't mean I want to share a fandom with my mom. If she wants gay boys she can do it for Star Trek!

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

If she'd used that to sell it I might have been more likely to read it. At nine I was smuggling sex ed pamphlets from the nurses office. Instead she was all MAMMMMMMMOTHS! And I was like "...No. Mammoths vs prostitute killers? Not a question."

[jedusaur]

I decided this comment needed its own post.

[piratesunk.livejournal.com]

That is fucking awesome. lol

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

I've been bugging her to get into Star Trek fandom for nearly a decade. Who would have guessed that fusions were the answer, not slashing MC's?

[cactus-cat.livejournal.com]

Holy crap, I wish my mother was half as cosmopolitan as yours. o_o She knows about fanfiction (when I got a good review on my first fic 11 years ago, I had no one else to squee at!), but I don't think she knows that it tends to be a lot pornier than the books she reads.

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

I've been bugging her about Star Trek for a decade, but she's always like KIRK AND SPOCK ARE NOT GAY. Who would have guessed that fusions with new characters would be the way to get her to read fic? *sigh* It'll be awkward if she starts liking bandom though.

[cactus-cat.livejournal.com]

That sort of makes sense - I used to break my ex-boyfriend's brain on a regular basis all "Jeeves/Wooster slash, it's awesome" and "Holmes/Watson is pretty much canon". :D Characters you felt connected to before you realized you could slash them can be harder to get into.

Hmm... If that's the problem, can you convince your mother that the reboot Kirk and Spock are different! and new! and therefore could totally be gay for each other even if the old ones weren't?

OTOH, another ex saw XMFC, and (un-prompted!) declared it slashy as hell.

[sydneysconverse.livejournal.com]

Similar thing happened to me. Except, my Mom asked if I wrote/read porn on the Internet, all serious like, I was like, 'LMFAO ROFL' and then a few days later she brought it up again and I was like, 'yup'.

She wants to read some of my porn, Miss Gala. And I'm like, O_O uh,nooooo.

But, lol, your Mama sounds great. :D

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

My parents have known forever, but they've never expressed an interest in reading it. I don't think they have to, really, when I'm stuck on big bangs/fest fics I bitch about WHY WON'T FRANK STOP HAVING SEX AND START HAVING A GODDAMN CONVERSATION. Or vice versa. Usually it's vice versa, I love writing dialog. So they know all my 'plots' anyway.

[katelinmr.livejournal.com]

I love your mom!!! *grabby hands*

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

There are things between us that suck. But there are amusing things too, like this.

[harpsi-fizz.livejournal.com]

In the year 2211, some 15 year old girl will be reading fanfiction. The fanfiction will be written by a user commenting on your journal and the girl will be that user's granddaughter, but she won't find out until later.

Have you thought about downloading Natural Reader (http://www.naturalreaders.com/index.htm) for your mom?

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the link. I think that could really help. She got pretty depressed when she had to stop going on her forum a while back.

[luvscharlie.livejournal.com]

I'm kind of in love with this post. Kind of like totally in love with this post.

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

The entire time I was like I DON'T KNOW IF I'M AMUSED OR HORRIFIED. Especially when she said "I know where things go". That's...good? I'm...glad you know where dicks go during buttsex?

[luvscharlie.livejournal.com]

There's really just no good reply for that, is there?

[greedy_dancer]

I'm so glad my mom can't read English very well.

YOU MIGHT HAVE CREATED A MONSTER!

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

If she goes all "Tell me more about Pete and Mikey" I have no idea what I'll do. Do I really need to send my mom to a primer, or show her FOB lyrics?

[turps33.livejournal.com]

Ahahahaha.

I'm sorry, I'm laughing because you're reminding me of my kidlet, who's probably horrified his mam writes slashfic *G*

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

I don't care if she likes The Gay. It'll be a refreshing change from nearly a decade of SPOCK AND KIRK WERE STRAIGHT STACI. I just don't want her to be in MY fandom. It's miiiiiine!

[bebunny.livejournal.com]

Oh my God, I am so sorry.

I honestly don't know whether to laugh or cry, I'm glad the sky doesn't seem to be falling in. I hope she enjoys it, I'm all kinds of self concious now.

:/

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

Nothing to be sorry for, it was all my own damn fault. I was just like /o\ OMG WHAT JUST HAPPENED?

I don't know if it's going to happen today, she's having a nap after going to the gym. But I'm sure she'll at least start it, and if she finishes I'll make her leave you a comment.

[bootson.livejournal.com]

Oh dear! This is why I never tell. Mom about fix, I'm afraid she'll get all INTERESTED. Though this could end up super amusing if your mom's actually... You know... Into it later. Also, she sounds totally adorable.

[gala-apples.livejournal.com]

She hasn't been interested for the decade I've been doing it, I've ranted/squeed through Buffy, Angel, HP, Skins, and now Bandom. Not to mention causual mentions of 'damn, House and Wilson should totally be having sex' or 'Gibbs is totally domming Tony'. But include Jean Auel and apparently ALL THE BUTTSEX!!! I don't even know. It'll be both funny and horrifying if she ends up liking bandom. She already likes the music.

[luvscharlie.livejournal.com]

I have Tetris, Yahtzee and a book, if that's everything let me know, babe and send me your address so I can get them to the post office on Monday.